I have made it absolutely no secret that I find writing hugely therapeutic - it is my way of getting everything out of my overcrowded mind. It is my release. And yet when I tell people that I am back to writing again, they automatically feel happy for me, do you know me at all? Me writing in my diary or on lined paper means one very obvious thing - I need help, and it isn't my family who aren't supporting me because they really are. It seems to me that the second that I believe that I can go back to fully trusting and relying on someone, they categorically prove me wrong and I go right back to being hurt. What's worse is that they seem to have no idea or if they do they simply do not care - how am I meant to rely on you when you never rely on me but you feel no guilt in doing the things you know hurt me. I am the one who is left feeling unbelievably stupid and insignificant. How can anyone have the power to make a person feel so incredibly small and crumble your new found confidence? All that I can say is that it is not my fault, it is not my mistake, and if a person ever makes you feel like this, they do not truly care about you. I need to learn that waiting for what I know is within a person is disappointing and ultimately will hurt and ruin you. I truly believed that I could trust them this time. You lied.