www.heyray129.com
Just in case any of you missed the memo, the Hey Ray blog has now moved to a new home!! Go check it out, I have spent a lot of time on it so I hope you like it...
www.heyray129.com
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Just when I didn't think that things could get much worse, they inevitably did. As one of the people I really relied on is no longer there for me I started to panic a lot. It's a feeling that I would compare to abandonment. That might sound massively overdramatic but I don't know how else to express my feelings. Now I am not admitting this to all of you for attention, as that is not something that I am wanting. I say this as a way of explaining why I have been particularly negative lately. It is exceptionally hard to let go of something that you clung to. However, this has taught me so very much about myself and that I am stronger than I give myself credit for. No one deserves to be made to feel less than you are and it's time I stood up for myself. Now whilst I have been struggling with all of this I cannot begin to tell you how you have all helped me. For some reason, I have received many messages from some of my readers. Whilst some people have let me down so much, you all have helped me. Many of you I have never met, and it is you that I am now relying on. Your words are so kind, and I am so happy that you feel you can trust me and have an open conversation with me. Everyone of you have such an amazing amount of worth to me, even if you don't think you do, I'm telling you that you are important to me. You are all inspirational, and I thank you for helping me. "I write because I don't know what I think until I read what I say" Unfortunately everyone faces some horrible times in their lives and have to make some decisions that they never wanted to make. From what I've learnt, all I can say is don't draw it out for longer than it needs. It is so easy to love memories and cling on to them. But ultimately when you aren't happy, the world is a very dark and sad place. We need to surround ourselves with people who will make things a lot better. Some decisions are meant to challenge you, it shows your personal limits and what is important to you. When what is important to you is no longer important to someone else then you need to review it all. I have recently been given more than enough time to reflect on a lot of things. These last few weeks have been absolute hell for me and I believe that I don't deserve to feel like this anymore. 2015 is a new year, and this is the year I am going to get better. I promise that to every single one of you reading this. No matter what it takes, no matter how selfish I have to be, I will get better. No one is going to hold me back anymore, I need to find the strength within me a realise certain things aren't worth the pain anymore. |